Fear, Faith and... New Mexico
This morning during a time of quiet I was reading Psalm 61. Somewhere in the midst of its words something became so clear: My greatest fear, (oft unseen yet always close by) is that all the great projects of my life are being carried out under my own power. That is to say, that God is not really the One clearing the way before, giving the strength to proceed, calling me forward in all things. The thought that all that I have done, all that we have done together, has been done completely of ourselves threatens to strip all that is beautiful from our lives.
All this means quite a bit to me today, because yesterday I began the difficult process of telling my dear friends of Gadsden, Alabama that Amy and I feel God leading us to a new field of ministry far away. We will be moving to Albuquerque, New Mexico at the end of this year. We are as excited about this calling as we are grieved over departing so much that is dear. I saw a dear friend at Wal-mart just yesterday and I wanted to cry. (But really, you can't cry at Wal-mart there's just too much joy waiting over in electronics, but that's another blog)
Oz Guiness talks about the loss of calling, the ceasation of the search for our purpose as a form of sloth. I think there's some truth to that. We do have the ability to choose whether to pursue questions of calling. In fact there is some sin in not doing so. And what we find down that road.. the roads we go down because of what we find.. and who leads us down those roads, that's... everything. A beautiful, life giving, everything.
All this means quite a bit to me today, because yesterday I began the difficult process of telling my dear friends of Gadsden, Alabama that Amy and I feel God leading us to a new field of ministry far away. We will be moving to Albuquerque, New Mexico at the end of this year. We are as excited about this calling as we are grieved over departing so much that is dear. I saw a dear friend at Wal-mart just yesterday and I wanted to cry. (But really, you can't cry at Wal-mart there's just too much joy waiting over in electronics, but that's another blog)In the end though, to remain in a place of comfort when God seems to be far out ahead of us would be to choose the very life I've just said I fear. For the Christian who has grown to a place where such is his fear, there really is no other choice, because at this moment God for us will only be found in New Mexico, just as His was waiting for us in Alabama and Tennessee before that and Colorado before that.
May (this man) reign under God's protection forever.
Appoint your unfailing love and faithfulness to watch over him.
Then I will always sing praises to your name as I fulfill my vows day after day.
Psalm 61:7,8
Is there anything more I could ask?
Is there anything greater we could loose?
posted by Aaron McMillan at 5:46 AM
3 Comments:
Hey Aaron,
This must be a busy and anxious time for you and Amy. We will pray for you and for the move out West. I guess you both have a calling for that side of the country. I'm always surprised at how many times our Denver Seminary trip eons ago still comes up in conversations. Take care,
Richard Wright
Hey Richard, How... did I send this to you? So good to hear from you. You're at FBC Memphis. I was at St. John's Episcopal from 00-03 and of course Memphis is home. Maybe we do have a calling to the west... How are things for you and Tiffany? -Aaron
Ha. I knew you would ask that. Amy is a Facebooker and I have become one lately. I try to stay off of it but it beckons my attentions at times. Amy let me know your blog site because she noticed mine on the page I guess. We keep missing each other don't we. I was in B'ham for four years and actually got to know the recreation guy over at St. John's a few years back. Beautiful church. We are doing well. Tiffiny is working hard as an RN and I am on my 4th year here at FBC. Great people and great place to work. When do you move? Coming to Memphis for the holidays?
Post a Comment
<< Home